I’ve come to a realization. The “American Pickers” will be out of business if, in a few decades from now, they are “picking” items from the 21st Century. We throw everything away! Flat screen TV breaks? Put it at the curb. Dishwasher? Buy a new one. Computer? Some buy those and stick it in a microwave oven when they get home (more on that below).
A few days ago, the Apple iPhone 6 and iPhone 6 plus went on sale for the first time. As usual with Apple Zombies, they lined up for days wanting to be the first in their neighborhood to have the latest cool gadget from Apple. Granted it basically does the same thing as previous iPhone models and if you wait a week or two you can walk right into a store and buy one. But, who am I to disparage those who choose to bring out their inner vagrant and sleep on a sidewalk for a few nights in hopes of getting a new handheld computer.
There are many who would say those who lined up for days and slept in the gutter lack “common sense.” But, I’m thinking bigger picture here. They don’t lack common sense for waiting in line for days. They lack common sense for dropping hundreds of dollars on an iPhone and then taking their new found bounty home, bending it and sticking it in a microwave!
Whiskey Tango Foxtrot!
The past week has been filled with news stories of the iPhone 6 and 6 plus “bending.” You know what also bends? The iPhone 4S, iPhone 5’s and Android phones.
Bend it and it will break.
Then came an “internet” rumor and we all know we can believe everything we read on the internet. The double super-secret thing you can do with that very expensive handheld computer is charge it in a microwave oven. Stick a metal case and computer chips in a microwave and let it cook for 4 or 5 minutes. Well that makes perfect sense, huh?
When the iPhone 7 comes out (and it will), I say if someone waits in line for days and sleeps on a mall sidewalk to buy the new smartphone, they’re not to be trusted. They lack “common sense” and will be forbidden from owning one!
We now know, lacking “common sense,” they’ll take the iPhone to their parent’s basement where they live, bend it, put it in their mother’s microwave, flush it down the toilet or fire up their dad’s lawn mower and run over it with the Toro, if they can gather up that much motivation.
Obviously, it’s not their money. Mom and dad must be paying for it.
Ain’t it great to live in mom’s basement?
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